Monday, December 31, 2007

Do's and Don'ts: Air Travel

Having recently traveled by plane, I encountered some situations that inspired this post.

DO:

-Try to quickly gather your things after passing through security. I know they make you practically get naked, but those grey bins pile up fast.
-Follow the "one seat between" rule whenever possible while waiting at the gate.
-Smile at the stranger who ends up sitting next you on the plane. You don't have to chat it up (please don't think you even need to say anything to me), but at least smile.
-Refrain from buckling your seat belt when you're sitting on the aisle and the window seat next to you is empty. It's Christmas, they oversold the flight and had to bump four passengers, you KNOW you're not lucky enough for that seat to stay empty.
-Let everyone in the rows in front of you out before you barrel down the aisle. Just because you have an end seat doesn't mean everyone with a window seat should wait until the end.
-Keep your cell phone on vibrate at all times when your ring tone is "When the Saints Go Marching In". Actually, you should probably just change your ring tone.

DON'T:

-Stare at me while we're sitting at the gate. When I look at you, see you staring, look away and then look back at you - you should no longer be staring at me.
-Eat a tuna fish sandwich you brought with you in your "sack lunch". I'm a fan of tuna fish, but not when I'm sitting in enclosed spaces with recirculated air.
-Chase your tuna sandwich with Cool Ranch Doritos. It doesn't help your situation.
-Hog the middle arm rest. I only need a teeny, tiny corner of it. Didn't your mother teach you to share?
-Don't put your foot under the chair in front of me. That's my space. I realize you have long legs and airplanes are cramped, but that's why you're on the aisle.
-Don't shake your leg(s). You see, seats on a plane are all connected so you shaking your leg(s) shakes your chair, which shakes my chair, which shakes my arm, which shakes my book that I'm trying to read. Slap on your nicotine patch or pop your Ritalin BEFORE you get on the plane.
-Turn your body so your knees are angled toward mine (and crossing the imaginary line). We're strangers. We don't need to touch.
-Squeeze into a spot at the baggage carousel when there is no room. I claimed my spot 10 minutes ago. You were too late. Get up off me.
-Say "excuse you" to me when YOU are reaching over ME to get your bag. I'm happy to move out of your way, but don't act like I cut in front of you. Again, I claimed my spot and apparently you were too late.

Follow these simple instructions and no one will write a blog about you post-travel.

You're welcome.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Just Doing His Job

Once upon a time a girl and her father were stopped by the police on Christmas Day. Apparently the officer thought it was strange to see two people out on the deserted streets of the small town at 12:30 am on Christmas Day (night) with cameras on tripods taking pictures.

Oh, and it was 17 degrees outside.

THE END.




Monday, December 24, 2007

Stalking Opportunity

MSN is reporting that Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelley married yesterday in Park City. I really wish I could have hung out in (read: stalked) Park City this weekend.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

R & R

What is it about being home that makes me want to sleep? The first two nights here I went to bed at 8:30 and 9:00...that's 6:30 and 7:00 mountain time. And when I say "went to bed" I mean was fighting so hard to keep my eyes open but finally fell asleep on the couch. Oh, and I slept for 12 hours each night.

I was a little worried that something was seriously wrong with me but I'm happy to report that things are back to normal. I think it's just that this is a comfortable place and I've been able to really relax for the first time in weeks.

So far I have:
+Played cards with Grandpa and even though I got two Little Horses in a row, Mom and I lost three games to one
+Visited the cemetery
+Ate dinner at Bob Evans. Yes, Bob Evans.
+Finished Christmas shopping
+Completed the Nutcracker puzzle. I've put it together so many times that 750 pieces took me roughly 90 minutes tops.
+Dinner at Johnny Rockets
+Saw the new National Treasure movie with the parents
+Spent some time with Josh
+Went to church
+Took a two hour nap
+Had Sunday dinner with the Cousins
+Caught up on blog reading and PerezHilton gossip

Life in H-Town is shaping up well.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

I'll Be Home For Christmas

Tomorrow at this time I'll be home. Probably sitting in the living room watching a movie or reading a book and just settling into the comfort of that familiar place. I haven't been home in 1 1/2 years and haven't been home for Christmas in 2 years.

I can't believe it's here already! I'm excited.

Santa Came!


Last night Lindsay and I exchanged gifts and I'm pretty sure I won't be having any conversations with actual people for at least a week. Or two.

She also gave me Tetris (which I love!) and now I just have to get Dr. Mario and I'll be set.

I'm extending an Official Tetris Challenge to Brian and/or Amanda when I get back from Michigan.

Thanks, Linds!

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Getting Personal

My parents still live in the same house I grew up in so I've never had the pleasure of living in a house that's for sale...until now.  There's so much pressure to keep everything clean and organized and I'm not doing a very good job.  It's a little weird to think of strangers roaming through the place I live and, essentially, judging me.

Today I came home and found that someone had walked through the house.  There was a comment card left on the kitchen table with several very nice things written:

"Great home"
"Very clean and shows well"
"Great display of home"

And then the last comment...

"Would recommend painting pink bathroom!"

Rude. The only negative thing written on the card and it's referring to MY bathroom. 

I was inspired one day as I was walking through Target and saw a bundle of washcloths that looked so adorable - pink, white, tan and chocolate brown.  So I bought them and decided to re-decorate my bathroom using that color scheme.


Two of the walls were already beige, I bought a white shower curtain, bought chocolate brown towels and painted the walls pink.  I see nothing wrong with it.  (They're just lucky I didn't leave it the Pepto-Bismol pink it was for a few hours.)

Regardless, I feel personally attacked and I don't think I like it.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

Adventure's in Michael's

An impromptu trip to Michael's turned out to be a free show of sorts.

Cast of characters:
Me
My brother, Brian
What's Happening!! Girl
Meth Girl
Turtle Girl
Acne Boy
Liquor Store Man
Wreath Girl

Sounds good, right?

Act I: The Dilemma
Brian and I hit up the Michael's in Sugarhouse to pick up a frame as part of a Christmas present. We finally decided on which style to get and were presented with two choices:

#1 A frame with a "ding" on the side
#2 A frame with a dirty, smudged mat.

Neither of which met my standards.

Act II: The Plan
I devised a plan to switch the clean mat out of the dinged-up frame with the dirty mat in the good frame. Before doing so I wanted to check with an employee to make sure it would be fine.

Brian: Have you ever shopped at Michael's before?
Me: Not really. Why?
Brian: Because they aren't very friendly. Or helpful. You shouldn't even bother asking, just switch them.

Of course I was too nervous to just make the switch without permission and proceeded to find an employee. The girl I found Brian referred to as What's Happening!! Girl and she chomped on her gum with her mouth wide open and so hard I thought her teeth might break. I explained the situation and she said that I should ask customer service.

We made our way to customer service and were met by Meth Girl. Brian said she was "one bad day away from telling her parole officer she didn't want the job and was going back to her meth addiction." We explained the situation again, holding both frames in hand, and she said, "Is it even going to fit?". To which I replied, "They are the same frame so, yes, it will fit." She told us she didn't see why it would be a problem and then said, "I'm not very good at this." Not very good at taking the back off of a picture frame and lifting up the mat? I know the meth may have done some damage, but seriously? But I guess you can be bad at it because she slid each hook on the back over one at a time trying to pull the back off in between each one. A normal person might have realized that you need to slide all of them first and THEN try to take the back off, but not Meth Girl.

Act III: The Checkout
The switch finally happened and we went to a check out stand. The girl there, who Brian referred to as Turtle Girl, had no one in line and was shifting some items on her counter. She waited until he got all the way to the counter and had set down the frame before saying "I'm in the middle of another transaction" in a weird robot voice.

We then went to wait in line at the only other open register. Brian didn't come up with an exact name for the boy behind the counter but seemed to think his acne defined him. Acne Boy was helping a man who was rambling on about the liquor store down the street. Acne Boy cut him off and said, "I'm only 16 so I don't really know..." The man then proceeded to give him what sounded like tips about not getting ID'd at the liquor store...I'm not quite sure.

Then, to top off the experience, the lady in front of us who had been "fluffing" her fake wreath suddenly turned and asked if it looked fake or not. I replied that it didn't and that it looked great. She said, "Of course it looks fake." Alright then.

The End.

Everyone put on their best performance. We didn't know we were in for such a treat.

Productivity

Today was the most productive Saturday I've had in a long time. Aside from the fact that I accidentally slept in (only until 10am), I was able to accomplish all that I had on the schedule for the day. With my departure for Michigan looming near and the knowledge that I will probably be staying at work late next week to finish a couple projects, I had to actually make a plan for my day.

This is what went down:
+ iTunes updating. How did I get so many songs without track names, artists and/or albums? And why am I so OCD that I need to manually update it all?
+ Christmas shopping which, for the first time this holiday season, included more gifts for other people than for myself. The score today -- Stephanie: 4 Other People: 6
+ I had to write a check for $1 to get out of the parking garage. I made several purchases but completely spaced getting validation. FYI - you can't use a theater validation unless you've been there long enough to actually see a movie (clever). The lady was even kind enough to explain to me that if I didn't have a dollar bill then four quarters would work too. That was news to me. I had no idea four quarters = one dollar.
+ Card shopping with Brian. We both suck at picking out cards.
+ Dinner with the fam to celebrate Annie's birthday.
+ More shopping. A very blog-worthy story came from this trip. Stay-tuned.
+ Present wrapping while watching Love Actually. It has become tradition for me to watch this movie while wrapping my heart out.
+ An episode of Dawson's Creek with Emily and Chelsea. I'm glad they share my love for the creek.
+ Em getting pissed because Max always has to be picked up so dramatically. It's true. (Anyone who has seen one of his stretches knows what she's talking about.)
+ To Do list updating. I'm sure I've previously expressed my love for good To Do list.

My favorite conversation of the night went something like this:

Me: She has a giant crush on him.
Brian: A what?
Me: Giant crush.
Brian: I thought you said "va-giant crush".
Me: (Laughing so hard I could have been a danger to other drivers on the road) What does that even mean?
Brian: I don't know. I was hoping it was going to be something good.

"Smarney in laughlin". "Va-giant crush". Apparently not hearing correctly is a family trait.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Light Bulb

Lindsay and I, each sitting in our respective corners of the office, just had a ten minute phone conversation about our plans for the next five days, when it suddenly hit me that we could be having this conversation at home.

Friday, December 07, 2007

Disagreement

Today at lunch Lindsay, Stephanie and I went to a classy truck stop in West Valley called Maxie's. (Sidenote: Lindsay said she likes going there because she's usually the classiest person there. It's true.)

I thought to myself, "I want the grease!", so I got a grilled ham and cheese and the most delicious fries I've ever had.

It's now four hours later and my stomach is saying, "You can't handle the grease!". I have the worst stomach ache ever. Ok, maybe not the worst ever, but it hurts.

All the pain is worth the delicious fry/fry sauce combo.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

Clarification Please

Why is there live music coming from the warehouse connected to my office? I hear a guitar and drums.

Does it turn into some sort of club after 6 pm?

Update: There is now singing. Harmonizing. "Don't Let Me Down" by The Beatles. I'm so confused.

Risky Business

The other day I was on a conference call with one of our vendors and she said something that left me momentarily speechless.

What they say: "You need to give us more budget in order for us to improve performance."

What I say: "You need to improve your performance before I will give you more budget."

Call me crazy.

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Media glands? Seriously?

I'm a fan of giving blood. I'm not scared of needles and it makes me feel like I'm actually helping in some small way. I haven't done it for nearly two years because I got pretty sick the last time, but when I pulled into work this morning and saw the blood mobile in the parking lot, I figured it was time to give it another shot.

It was business as usual until, as the blood guy was finishing things up, he tried to have a conversation with me. He was actually pretty cute and I was expecting something other than what happened...

Blood Guy: "So, what do you do here?"
Me: "I'm a Media Strategist." (I note the look of confusion on his face.) "I put together media plans for our clients.
BG: (Now looking extra confused.) "The what?"
Me: "Media plans."
BG: "Media glands?"
Me: "PLANS. Like when we buy TV or Internet advertising space...we're a marketing company."

*Awkward silence. I'm pretty sure he still doesn't get it.*

BG: "So how long have you been doing that?"
Me: "Two and a half years."

*Awkward silence. Apparently he starts to laugh.*

BG: "I'm sorry I'm laughing."
What I heard: "Smarney in laughlin."

*Awkward silence. Now I'm the one confused and I just smile in response because I have no idea what he's talking about and am too distracted to think of anything to say.*


BG: "It's just that I want to ask you another question, but I don't know where to go from there. That's why I'm laughing."

*Awkward silence. It dawns on me that he didn't actually say "Smarney in laughlin" but it's too late to formulate any sort of response. Plus, my arm is now straight up in the air and I'm putting on pressure to stop the bleeding.*

BG: "I've just never met one of you before."

By then it was over. The conversation had more than derailed so I just smiled and nodded. He lost me at media glands and I just couldn't get past it.

Although he may not be great with conversation, he's exceptional with the needle. Not a bruise in sight. Maybe next time he should skip the small talk.

My iPod Delivers

At the end of the day I had a project I needed to rush to complete so I broke out the iPod to help me concentrate. I opted to listen on shuffle as opposed to my usual setting of Brandi Carlile's live songs and, surprisingly, shuffle did not disappoint.

I'll admit, I have a lot of junk on my iPod. Almost every CD I own is on there and I own some lame CDs. Which is why I was so surprised when I didn't have to skip any songs.

Here's what I got:
  • Downpour - Brandi Carlile
  • Whisper - A Fine Frenzy
  • River - Sarah McLachlan
  • Such Reveries - Duncan Sheik
  • Ireland - Tori Amos
  • Sunday Morning Song - Howie Day
  • Angels We Have Heard on High - Josh Groban
  • Gone - Brandi Carlile
  • Was It You? - Spoon
  • Falling Slowly - Once Soundtrack
  • Girl - Across the Universe Soundtrack
  • Annie Waits - Ben Folds
  • I Just Can't Live a Lie - Carrie Underwood
  • Home - Michael Buble (Live)
C'mon - giving me Brandi Carlile right off the bat and again halfway through? I like it.

Thank You, Santa.

Have I ever mentioned that I love John Krasinski? Well, I do. And if I can't see him in person then seeing him super, super sized would be the next best thing.
I don't even know what I would do if I had to walk past this gigantic Jim billboard every day. I probably would never make it to work. I'd just stop and stare and forget that I even had anywhere to be.

Thanks, Danny, for hookin' a girl up.

Friday, November 30, 2007

The Great Debate

In the midst of an afternoon email fight with a co-worker (maybe not as much a fight as my expression of him being wrong) I stumbled upon this gem on Carlee's blog.

Carlee and I fought this fight last year and apparently she's looking for a repeat and taking it to the masses. And, if I do say so myself, it's very well written. I think she was on the debate team or something. Anyway, my point is that I was laughing so hard a one point that tears were streaming down my face.

You should really read the whole thing, but here is the sentence that made me pee my pants:

It's the same reason I don't write/sing songs about Hanukkah, soggy bread, sex before marriage, cinnamon or Miracle Whip - I just don't believe in them.

Three of the things on her list I actually DO believe in, but I get the point. And it's also hilarious.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Something To Look Forward To

I'm pretty excited for Juno. Michael Cera is fantastic and, from the previews, it looks like he won't disappoint.

I have three words for you: George. Michael. Bluth.

And PLEASE tell me you've seen Superbad. If you haven't, you should. Just ignore all the F-bombs and you'll be fine.

Plus, in Juno he'll be reunited with Jason Bateman. Delightful.

Wanna See Something Embarrassing?

I'm sure you do. Gross.

New Love

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Broken Filter

Last weekend I went to my favorite nail salon for a mani/pedi. After I arrived and picked out my color I was called over to my chair by the "new girl". Apparently it was only her second day there. Lucky me.

Not only was it the worst mani/pedi I've ever gotten, but we actually had this conversation:

As she's massaging (read: barely touching) my leg she points to two quarter-size bruises near my knee and looks up at me.

Me: Oh yeah...I don't know where those came from.
New Girl: Hmmm. Your boyfriend did it?
Me: Ummm...(awkward laughter)...no, I think I just bumped it on something. I bruise really easily.

I glanced over at Lindsay to make sure she had caught the conversation. She had. Let me break this down for you.

1. I don't have a boyfriend that beats me.
2. Why would she automatically assume that just because I have a bruise that it came from my boyfriend?
3. If my boyfriend did beat me, you, new girl, would not be the person I would confide in.
4. If I were to confide in someone at the nail salon it would be Tracy the best acrylic nail tech ever, or Kim my eyebrow waxer, or Lani my favorite pedicure lady. Not you, sucky new girl. Not you.

During the course of my visit she also told me how she doesn't like to wear a lot of clothes because they make her look fat and that she broke her cell phone because she threw it against the wall while fighting with her boyfriend.

New Girl's got issues and I will be avoiding her at all costs.

Monday, November 26, 2007

You Can't Make Me

Sometimes I just don't want to blog. Lately that sometimes has been all the time.

In fact, for the past week or two I've been avoiding the computer entirely (except when at work because it might be part of my job to love the internet). For nearly the entire holiday weekend I managed to avoid mindlessly surfing the internet. Not even Perez could lure me in.

What's wrong with me?

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Time

Sometimes I wonder why it feels like there is never enough time to get anything done at work. Is it because I'm blogging at 11:00 am? Possibly, but I don't think so. I'm pretty sure it's because meetings are taking over my life.

I looked at my calendar this morning and realized that, of the 9 hours I will be in the office today, I only have 3.5 hours to do work. (No, I was not channeling Big Black there.) My lunch hour is even scheduled and while it does include free food, I hate not being able to get out of here for a while.

My point is, how can I be expected to get any work done when I have no time in the day to actually it? If you figure it out, let me know.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Step By Step

I just loaded New Kids on the Block: Greatest Hits into iTunes.

No, I didn't just buy the CD. Yes, I'm kind of excited about it.

Monday, November 12, 2007

Things About Me

1. I like to keep the TIVO "clean". Too many shows backed up stresses me out.
2. I have an addictive personality. I get obsessed with things (TV shows, music, etc.) pretty easily.
3. I think it's sexy when guys drive a stick shift.
4. I'm generally unaware of my strengths and very conscious of my weaknesses.
5. I didn't wear my hair curly until I got to college. Try straightening your hair in 90% humidity - not fun (or pretty).
6. I originally wanted to go to college in a big city. I never would have survived.
7. I played tennis for two years in high school and I wasn't good. I took lessons between the two seasons and when I came back my coach apologized for not paying attention to me the year before.
8. I HATE humidity.
9. I once slept for 17 hours straight.
10. I want to have a house with a wrap-around porch someday.
11. Fall is my favorite season. I love the changing leaves and it's one of the things I miss most about Michigan.
12. I didn't drink diet soda until I lived with Tatum. It was Dr. Pepper all the way before that.
13. I didn't call pop "soda" until I moved to Utah. I still feel guilty about switching over.
14. I got glasses during my senior year of high school.
15. I sleep diagonally with my head in the right corner and my feet in the left corner of my bed.
16. I used to talk in my sleep. I haven't shared a room with anyone for a couple years so no one has been able to repeat back to me the crazy things I say.
17. I brush my teeth first and then wash my face. Always in that order. Morning and night.
18. I go through phases of being addicted to Peanut Butter Cup Blizzards from Dairy Queen.
19. Once I was addicted to Root Beer Freezes from A&W.
20. I am in love with Tim Riggins from Friday Night Lights.
21. I don't know how to swim. I can't even float. It's sad...
22. I only like to order a non-water beverage at a restaurant if at least one other person orders one. If everyone else orders water I feel the need to follow suit.
23. I am not a morning person. I wish I was.
24. I love to read. My love for reading started with The Babysitters Club and Sweet Valley Twins.
25. I'm slightly obsessive compulsive (self-diagnosed). I used to have a thing about checking the locks before I went to bed.
26. I would prefer to wear flip-flops 365 days a year.
27. I love To Do lists. I like to make them, work off of them and cross things off.
28. I love my cat, Max. And I like to think that he loves me back.
29. I am afraid of change and will usually do what I can to avoid it.
30. I typically don't remember my dreams.
31. My favorite candy bar is the PB Twix, but when that was discontinued for a while (like 10 years or something) I settled for the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup.
32. I love the feeling of climbing into clean sheets after getting out of the shower.
33. I love the smell/feel of warm laundry straight from the dryer.
34. I get a pedicure on a regular basis.
35. I think Daylight Savings is backwards.
36. I am obsessed with Brandi Carlile. I think she's amazing and would love to be her friend.
37. I saw the ocean for the first time when I was 23 years old.
38. I once watched You've Got Mail every Sunday for an entire semester in college.
39. I would never wish to go back to high school but I miss my friends from that time in my life and wish I kept in better touch.
40. I love music. I love the way it can bring out such strong emotions and pull memories to the surface.
41. I cry every time I watch Extreme Home Makeover after they yell, "Bus driver, move that bus!" and the family sees their new home for the first time. Without fail.
42. I was Salutatorian of my graduating class and spoke at my high school graduation.
43. I love black and white photos of buildings or cities.
44. In my mind even numbers are "good" and odd numbers are "bad". All of my favorite numbers are even.
45. I used to race kids to computer class in middle school so I could play Oregon Trail or this dungeon typing game that I can't remember the name of.
46. I only rode the bus to school for two years - 7th and 8th grade.
47. My nickname as a kid was Boo. I don't have a lot of memories with people calling me that but apparently one day I was just over it.
48. I miss my mom's cooking.
49. I'm anxious for my children and nieces/nephews (when they all eventually get here) to have close relationships because I wasn't close to most of my cousins.
50. I love seeing movies in the theater.
51. When I was a kid I wanted to own a candy store like the one Charlie goes to in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory with wooden shelves and the ladders that roll. Either a candy store or a book store with a similar look.
52. I change out of my work clothes as soon as I get home. I'm probably in my pj's earlier than anyone you know.
53. I wish I could sing well. I would love to take voice lessons.
54. I want to gossip and talk bad about people less. It's hard.
55. I cheated my way through geometry in 8th grade. The proofs got me every time!
56. My name for four years in high school Spanish was Eva Maria.
57. I used to ride my bike everywhere as a kid. There wasn't a part of town that Brandi and I hadn't explored on our bike rides.
58. I would rather be cold than hot.
59. I decided one day in high school that I wanted to go into advertising. No reason, really. And I did it.
60. My mom made me peanut butter toast and chocolate milk for breakfast most mornings growing up.
61. In kindergarten I got a paper cut on my eyeball as I was flipping over a piece of green construction paper.
62. As a kid I had a serious fear of Freddy Krueger.
63. I still get the chills every time I see a picture of him.
64. I admire each of my siblings for very different reasons. They are pretty awesome people.
65. I wore sweat suits to school a lot in second grade. Pastel colored sweat suits. Yup.
66. I went through a phase where I had to have the legs of my sweat pants pulled up mid-calf, even walking to school or on the playground in the single digit temperatures. I thought it wasn't cool to wear them any other way. I was wrong.
67. My mom was a substitute teacher in my elementary school. I used to stay after school with her and pretend I was teaching the class.
68. In third grade I read at an 8th grade reading level.
69. I love to putt-putt golf.
70. I would LOVE to vacation in Europe.
71. I wish I spoke another language fluently.
72. I've been in love.
73. I've had my heart broken.
74. I'm a picky eater. I don't like tomatoes, onions, mushrooms, any type of bean, peppers...the list could go on and on.
75. I have a secret crush on the bald guy from Miami Ink. I guess it's not so secret anymore.
76. I love to laugh.
77. My favorite movie used to be Fools Rush In. I'm not really sure why because it's not good.
78. I sleep with a fan on every night. No matter how cold it is outside.
79. I don't like to drink out of restaurant glasses without a straw.
80. I prefer to spend Friday nights at home watching a movie or reading a book.
81. I'm sort of a clean freak. I like my surroundings to be tidy.
82. I didn't fly on a plane until spring break of my junior year of high school.
83. I worked at Blockbuster for two summers during college. I loved it.
84. I got my first job ever as a Freshman in college at the Creamery on 9th. I only lasted two weeks.
85. My first concert was New Kids on the Block in 3rd grade. I loved Joey and Jonathan.
86. I'm not a spontaneous person, but sometimes I wish I was.
87. I've never been out of the country. Canada doesn't count.
88. I would like to visit the New England states (the furthest I've gone is up-state New York) and Oregon.
89. I went to Cedar Point at least once a year between 8-12th grade, maybe even before that.
90. I drove a red convertible my last two years of high school. It was technically Geoff's, but I used it while he was on his mission.
91. Sometimes I like a good cry. It just feels good.
92. I was the Vice President of my senior class in high school.
93. I have a testimony that I don't share enough.
94. I have a strange love for Jon & Kate Plus 8 on TLC. I can't explain it; I just love them!
95. I get embarrassed very easily.
96. Sometimes my face turns red even when I'm not actually embarrassed.
97. I wish I was better at saving money.
98. I'm a horrible story teller. I have a tendency to give too much background information and go off on a lot of tangents. The audience stops listening and I feel like an idiot.
99. I'm not good at anything relating to fractions. I can't add, multiply, divide them - nothing.
100. My worst years of seminary attendance were when it was taught by my mom in my basement. (Sorry Mom!)
101. As much as I like to complain, life is good.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

New Low

I honestly thought my life couldn't get any more boring...but it has. You may have noticed a lack of posts lately. It's not because I've been busy. It's because I have absolutely nothing to blog about.

So naturally I'm blogging about having nothing to blog about.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Six Hours

I'm about to share an insight into my personal hygiene that might be too much for some to handle. Consider yourself warned.

I don't floss.

Well, up until a month ago I didn't floss. (Unless, of course, it was two days before a dentist appointment. Which makes zero sense. If a dentist could be fooled into thinking you floss regularly just by flossing two days before an appointment then it wouldn't be necessary to floss daily, right?) But one day I decided that I wanted to join the ranks of those, most likely made up of dentists and dental hygienists, who floss daily.

So, I made it a goal. I got ambitious and had a little goal-setting session with myself and guess what was the first on the list--that's right, "floss daily". It's actually written on my list of current goals. Ellen DeGeneres told me that if I write it down, it will happen. She was right.

It's been a over a month now and I've been surprisingly consistent. But every night, as I'm going through the motions with no real conviction to the cause, I think about how great life used to be when I could just brush my teeth and climb into bed guilt free.

I figure it takes roughly one minute to floss, so over the next year I will spend six hours flossing my teeth. Six hours that could be spent watching TV a little longer or checking PerezHilton.com one more time or reading one more blog - you know, the really important stuff in life.

Doesn't seem so insignificant now, does it?

Sunday, November 04, 2007

I Heart Tim Riggins

Let's talk for a minute about Friday Night Lights.

Natalie told me for months how much I would love this show and I didn't believe her. I hated the movie, why would I like the show? One night I randomly picked up season one on DVD (it was only $20) and watched the entire season in three days. It was fantastic and I finished it just in time for season two's premiere.

During my season one marathon Natalie sent me a text asking me if I had an FNL boyfriend yet. I replied that I thought maybe it would be Tim Riggins. I was a little embarrassed about it.

Now I'm 100% sure it's Riggins and I'm not ashamed. I love, love, love him. He might even be number one of of all of my TV boyfriends.

Yes, that's right. He's beating out Jim Halpert and McDreamy even though the character is a 17 year old, drunken, man-whore delinquent. But he's an adorable 17 year old, drunken, man-whore delinquent. Adorable.

I just needed to get that off my chest. And if you're not watching, you should be. You won't regret it.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Definition of Personal Day

Work has been rough lately. I don't know what it is, but I've lost my ability to cope with pretty much any situation - the people I work with, the tasks I'm required to do, the clients I work on - all of it. Last week was the worst yet and was filled with a lot of venting (aka: yelling...literally yelling at Carlee), several anxiety attacks and a little mid-day crying in my cube.

Sunday night as I thought about coming in to work the next day I got sick to my stomach. So I decided I wasn't going to go. We have personal days and vacation days - not sick days and vacation days. I don't have to be sick to call in and, honestly, I don't have to give a reason because it's "personal".

It was one of the best days I've had in a long time.

I slept in until 9:45 am.
I got a pedicure.
I got a "90" minute massage (that was more like 70 minutes).
I went out to eat.
I went to a movie.
I didn't check my work email at all.

Unfortunately, I'm back at work today. I've only had one small moment of uncontrollable stress so far. We'll see how the rest of the day goes.

I'm pretty sure my job is hazardous to my health.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Interesting

The other day I saw a billboard for this organization. I thought it was interesting.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

A Gift

Lindsay and I got home from Boise last night at 3:45 am. We were tired from driving there and back in one day and ready to crawl into bed. Apparently Max missed us while we were gone because he left presents for both of us!

I walked in the door to find feathers in the hallway and I knew it was only going to get worse from there. I followed the feathers to my bedroom where more feathers and the bottom half of a bird body were waiting for me! Yup, that's right. The bloody stump of a bird body, legs and all.

Lindsay followed a small trail to her room where a pile of poo was waiting for her. Apparently bird doesn't agreed with Max's belly.

So we both went to work - Lindsay vacuuming feathers and picking up poo and me grabbing a shovel and scooping up the remains of a bird off my bedroom floor.

Why don't pets realize that dead animals don't make the best gifts? Money or jewelry would be sufficient.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Do Your Job

Dear Alarm Clock,
The question is often asked, Why am I here? or What is my purpose?. For some, the answers to those questions are hard to find. But for you, Alarm Clock, the answer is simple.

You're purpose is to wake me up. Most likely in the morning, but sometimes later in the day after a nap. I don't care how you do it, by radio or iPod, just as long as noise comes out of your speakers to bring me to consciousness.

This morning, Alarm Clock, you didn't do your job. And don't even try to blame it on me. Last night I checked to make sure you were set for 6:58am. I hit the proper button to let you know that the iPod was my preference. I set the song to Michael Buble's "Everything" and placed it in the slot. Every piece was in place.

But for some reason I didn't wake to the sweet sounds of Michael Buble. I woke to Max crying in my face and sun streaming through the window. I looked at the time on your front and when I saw 8:27 am I knew you had failed me. But you couldn't have, I had done everything right. I second guessed myself thinking I had snoozed you without realizing, but when I pulled the iPod off it's dock it was still set to "Everything" just as it had been the night before.

What went wrong, Alarm Clock? How could you do this to me? Lucky for you I made it from stepping out of bed to sitting at my desk in 45 minutes, but let's try for better performance tomorrow. What do you say?

Love,
Stephanie

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Sucked me right in.

This is how easy it is for the internet to suck your life away.
  • Last night I went to MSN to check the weather for today.
  • Saw a link to an article about Ellen's dog adoption freak-out. Read the article.
  • Saw a link at the bottom for another article about Ellen's dog adoption freak-out. Read the article.
  • Saw another link to an article about T.R. Knight (Bambi, The Fetus, O'Malley...whichever you prefer) and how he's happier since he's come out. Read the article.
  • The T.R. Knight article quoted something he said on Ellen's show on September 28th and I realized I never actually saw that episode because of TIVO Catasrophe 2007.
  • Went to YouTube to see if I could find the interview. Found it. Watched it.
  • Noticed a related video of Ellen's Oscar interview with Barbara Walters. Remembered we somehow missed that (and even tried to find it for days afterward) and watched it.
  • It turned out that it wasn't the full interview so I watched 3 or 4 other clips to try and catch parts I had missed.
  • Saw another related video of Ellen on the set of J.Lo's video. Watched it.
  • Realized it was 1:00am and that if I was going to try to get up "early" I should probably go to bed.
All of that just because I wanted to check the weather.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Darndest Thing

You know that old show Kids Do the Darndest Things (which was probably on Sunday nights right after America's Funniest Home Videos or in some other crappy time slot that it deserved)?

Well, I don't have kids. I have a cat. And, sometimes, cats do the darndest things.

As I was sitting in bed trying to do some "research" for a "meeting" I have tomorrow this is what happened. Twice. My cat is an attention whore.
Oh, and don't roll your eyes because it's another post about my cat.

In other news, there was an awesome rainbow on my way home from work today. A double rainbow at that. I can't even remember the last time I saw one.

Monday, October 15, 2007

One of Many

John Krasinski is one of my TV boyfriends. I just love him! Apparently him and Milo (AKA Jess) are buds.
How cute is he!? Seriously.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

He Works Hard For His Money


Did you think we were just going to let him live with us for free?

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Paparazzi

My one goal while I was in LA last month was to see a celebrity (even a C-Lister!) getting harassed by the paparazzi. I failed.

Lindsay Lohan on the loose in Utah has breathed new life into my goal. I now want to see her getting harassed by the paparazzi in SLC. This article mentions that they were "snapped heading to dinner Tuesday night in Salt Lake City".

Looks like I'm going to be hanging around downtown more often.

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Friends

It's nice to have friends who know me so well.

After one of the most frustrating meetings I've been to in a long time, I came back to my desk to find this IM waiting for me:

Carlee: "It's 4:22 and I'm looking at your face in this meeting and can tell you want to kill "so-and-so" as much as I do right now. That is all."

And she was right. Although, I would have added one or two more people to the list.

2007

Now and Then.

Friday, October 05, 2007

The Right Stuff

Natalie and I were having our daily "How'd you like last night's TV?" chat and as we were discussing the disappointment that is Grey's Anatomy so far, we stumbled upon Alex (aka: Mossimo..."She...she loves you Steve.") and his need for a make-over.

The conversation went like this:

Nat: Everyone except Bailey/Cristina kind of bother me.
Nat: Even my Mossimo!
Stephanie: Mossimo needs a haircut. Sick.
Nat: Who's rocking 1991 Jordan Knight hair

I'm still laughing as I type this. You've gotta love friends that can make you laugh!

Thursday, October 04, 2007

Monday, October 01, 2007

Rock Star

Comparison is courtesy of Danny.

Lead singer of Radiohead vs. Max.

Sunday, September 30, 2007

A New 'Do

I got tired of the lighter hair and wanted to go brown again. Ashlee suggested going a little darker than my natural color so I went for it. It came out looking slightly red, which I hadn't expected, but I still like it.

Can you tell the difference?

Before










After

Trauma: Life in the Pet ER

On Thursday night we noticed that the right side of Max's face was looking swollen. We thought maybe he had been stung by a bee or bitten by a spider and that it would go down on it's own. But Friday morning it was worse and by the time we got home from work on Friday night his eye could barely open and it was very pink. We went out to dinner for Lindsay's birthday and when we came back we decided we should take him to the vet. The only one we could find that was open that late was the "Pet ER".

The car trip was traumatic. Lindsay had purchased a "Pet Taxi", which helped in the transport, but Max was moaning and crying and it was breaking my heart to listen to it. Because he got so upset on the way down, both of his eyes were opened wide when we pulled him out of the carrier in the exam room and it was then that we saw the extent of the injury. Whatever was swelling in his cheek was pushing on his eyeball and bulging out through the bottom of his eye socket. Yes, bulging up through his eye socket. I gasped and nearly started crying. This picture doesn't quite do it justice, but you can kind of get the idea.

Max was being very good and brave. I may need to take back all the times I've called him Princess Max.

The doctor finally came in and examined him. He thought Max had probably gotten in a fight and had a wound that was infected, but he couldn't find one. As he was pushing on Max's face to find the wound, he must have pushed too hard because brown goo started pouring out of Max's eye. I couldn't watch it. It made me want to cry again. I guess the good news was that they didn't have to lance it, but the bad news was that Lindsay and I were supposed to try to push out the rest of the goo for the next few days at home.



The doctor left and Max was scared. He jumped off the exam table and onto the bench where I was sitting and tried to hide between me and the wall. We got his drugs and were able to take him home. He's doing much better now.



I told Lindsay that Max got her one night of not muddying up her sheets for her birthday, but I guess he decided to get her a$200 vet bill.

TIVO Catastrophe 2007

September is the best month of the year. Not just because September marks my birthday and the beginning of autumn, but because the new television season starts. I love TV. I get excited during the day about shows I know are coming that night. I re-watch my favorite episodes. I have weekly conversations with people to see what they thought about each episode. I just get "involved".

Thursday night was the night of television I had been looking forward to, even preparing for, since May. My two favorite shows were premiering: Grey's Anatomy and The Office. We had made plans - Jill was coming over and we were all going to order food and be excited and watch. I had stayed up until 2 am the night before finishing season three of Grey's on DVD so it would all be fresh in my mind.

Things did not go as planned.

I got home from work around 7:15 and Lindsay informed me that the "TIVO is wigging out". Uh oh. She continued to mess with it as I gently reminded her that this was a very important night and we only had 30 minutes before it started. She eventually determined that it would be fine, I trusted her judgement, and we left to pickup our food. We got back to the house at 8:15 and decided to start The Office first. We all settled in with our food as Lindsay hit the TIVO button...it froze again. This time we couldn't restart it because then it would stop recording and we were taking small comfort in the fact that both lights were illuminated indicating that two shows were recording.

So for the next 45 minutes all three of us stared at a frozen TIVO menu on a 61 inch TV. And for 45 minutes I got more and more angry. Lindsay said she was afraid I was going to hit her. Of course I wouldn't hit her. Doesn't she know that heavy sighing and the silent treatment are my weapons of choice?

At 9:00 the red lights went out and the TIVO restarted itself. We thought this was a good sign since it had waited until after the shows were over. We were able to pull up The Office and found that it had only recorded up to the point where we tried to start watching. 15 minutes. We got 15 minutes each of two hour-long shows.

Something had to be done. I suggested inviting ourselves over to Carlee's in Layton and Lindsay suggested inviting ourselves over to Danny & Stephanie's in Sugarhouse. There was no way I was going to miss these shows and if that meant inviting myself (and two other people) somewhere and intruding, I was going to do it. We went with the closer option and I sent Danny a text. Steph called me right back and said they were just on their way home to start watching and that we could join them if we wanted. I think she might have been a little surprised when I said we'd be right over. I wasn't messin' around.

It ended up being a fun night and we got to see both of our shows. But why is it that after a month of working perfectly, the TIVO had to break on the night we actually needed it? Why couldn't it have broken on one of the nights we were recording The Pick Up Artist or even The Soup?

As it turns out, it is irrepairable and they are sending a new one. It won't get here until Thursday or Friday so we may need to go old school and set the timer on the VCR this week.

I know I said a DVR/TIVO would change your life but sometimes it will let you down.

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

"You wanna be me, but you can't be me..."

This post is brought to you by the Grey's Anatomy Trivia Board Game champion!

That's right, tonight was the official Grey's trivia competition and I rocked it like I knew I would. Brian, Amanda, Lindsay and I cracked open the game (that B & A gave me for my birthday) for the first time. The game started off with Brian spontaneously calling out, "I get Izzie!". We didn't know he had such a strong preference. Amanda was Meredith, Lindsay picked Cristina and I got one of my favs, George.

It was less trivia than I thought it would be and Brian claims I did not win because of skill. I strongly disagree. We were surprised by how easy some of the questions were but there were some tough ones scattered throughout.

I won the first game and after "challenging" Amanda during the second game, I got to switch places with her on the board and ended up winning the second game as well.
I answered some pretty random questions that impressed the competition. I guess it doesn't hurt that Lindsay and I have recently re-watched seasons 1, 2 and over half of season 3 to prepare for the season premiere on Thursday.

Gold Star to whoever can answer all four of these correctly:
1. How long were Addison and Derek married?
2. What is the name of Joe's boyfriend?
3. What was Addison's FULL name before the divorce?
4. What is the name of Joe's bar?

My favorite wrong answer moment went something like this...

Lindsay: "Who claimed Meredith's panties off the bulletin board?"
Brian: "Uhh..."
Everyone: "C'mon! You have to know this one!"
Brian: "Addison."
Me: "No, Addison put them on the board!"
Brian: "Oohhh. My first thought was McFatty. Was it McFatty?"


Stephanie's Trivia: Who am I quoting in the title to this post? That statement was a result of what event?

Monday, September 24, 2007

That's Official


How awesome is it to have friends that feed your obsessions?

I'd say it's pretty awesome.

California Knows How To Party

How was California, you say? Well, I'll tell you...It was fantastic!

Wicked was so great! Lindsay, our sisters and Julie's friend, Audrey, met up for dinner before. After seeing the show I realized I didn't really know the whole story so it was fun to get filled in on the details. Ga-Linda (with a "Ga") or Glinda (the "Ga" is silent), whichever you prefer, was hilarious. Julie and I decided that she was a cross between Elle Woods from Legally Blonde and Mary Katherine from SNL. Over the top, but great. Julie and I also agreed that Elfaba was not as good as we'd hoped. I just wanted her to be better, but it was still so worth it!















On Sunday I hung out with Julie and Audrey. We drove up the Pacific Coast Highway but never actually got to stop on the beach.






Tuesday was Ellen Day! Lindsay and I got up early and drove up to Burbank. As it turns out, we didn't need to go quite so early, so we decided to hit up Denny's for brunch. That's the type of high-class establishment I like to frequent.

We waited in line after line for what seemed like forever. Lindsay's friend Emily and Em's friend Kate came with us. Kate got picked to ask an audience question so we were able to get seated first and in a great spot. The first few guests weren't that exciting but at the end we got to tape a segment with Jamie Foxx. He's hot and very funny. His interview made the day. The first show already aired, but the segment with Jamie Foxx airs on October 3rd. Set your TIVOs!

It's fun to get away for a few days but I always feel like I need to take a day off to recover from my vacation. I'm pretty sure I'll be sticking around Utah until Christmas. My bank account can't handle another trip!

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Kourianos Is The New Kanye

Danny's performance of "Stronger" in the San Diego airport was the highlight of the trip on Friday.



I don't know how to rotate the video. If you know how, let me know.

Got Fat?

Yup, I did and do.

I have a confession to make. I went on a business trip on Friday and wore a pair of pants that were 1.5 sizes too small. I couldn't button them. Well, I could have, but I chose not to. I spent the entire day with pants that were safety-pinned together.

Awesome.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

One Year Older and Wiser Too

Happy Birthday to me!

My birthday celebrations were very mellow this year, but I loved it. Since I was flying to California on my actual birthday, we decided to celebrate the night before.

A group of us went to dinner at Biaggi's after work and then went back to the house for some delicious ice cream cake - a Howard family classic. Others came just for cake.




Grey's Anatomy Trivia board game! How awesome is that!?














Audrey and Patrick's little boy, Oliver, was a huge hit with the ladies. So adorable!

















Thanks for all of the texts, calls, cards and emails. Natalie was the winner with two texts, a gChat and a Facebook post.

I feel like 25 is going to be the best year yet! (At least I'm hoping so.)

We Have a Winner!

This is my favorite email of the day, brought to you by our very own Cambo.
*Names have been changed to protect the innocent.


Question to Jane*: “Recent polls have shown that a 1/5th of Team 4 employees can’t work on a new client without being told to by a spreadsheet. Why do you think this is?”


Jane*: “I personally believe, that, Team 4 employees, are unable to do so, because uh, some people out there, in our workplace, don’t have spreadsheets, and uh…I believe that our training, like such as, planners and the list people, everywhere, like such as…and, I believe that they should, our training over here in the strategist department should help the strategists, or should help planners and should help the list people and the researchers, so we will be able to build up our proposal, for Silver’s client.”

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Almost Famous

Be sure to check out Ellen tomorrow (Wednesday). The taping we attended today will air tomorrow.

Kate (Emily's friend) got picked to ask an audience question but Ellen never made it to her because the mothers of the Kid Nation kids were too chatty. Regardless, because of Kate we got some pretty sweet seats.

Ellen was standing on our row when she was talking to the second audience member (whose question sucked, btw). We were in the center section to the right of Ellen. I'm sure you'll see Kate. She has blond shoulder length hair and was wearing a blue button-up shirt. Emily was next to her and has short blondish hair, glasses similar to mine and was wearing a black shirt. I was next to Em in a purple shirt and Linds was next to me in a black and white shirt.

Hopefully more than my saggy butt pants and off beat nervous clapping make it on TV this time!

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Who thinks of this stuff?

Tonight I had my birthday celebration (since I will be heading out of town tomorrow) and this was the card Lindsay gave me.

It could not have been more perfect.

In case you weren't aware, I love my cat. A lot. I talk about him like he's person. I hate people like me, but I can't help it.

But seriously, who comes up with this stuff?

Small World

My college roommate's husband's sister wrote some books about vampires that are wildly popular. Who knew?!

Life by Numbers

In ONE day I will be 25 years old.
In TWO days I will be dancing through life at WICKED.
In THREE days I will be laying by the pool.
In FOUR days I will be stalking Rob and Big.
In FIVE days I will be chillin' with Ellen DeGeneres.

Now that you mention it, life is good.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Eights

Natalie tagged me a couple weeks ago and I'm finally forcing myself to do it. It's harder than you would think!

8 Things I'm Passionate About
1. Music
2. Finding what it is I'm supposed to do with my life
3. Pop culture/celebrity gossip
4. My cat, Max
5. Self-improvement. Working on the little things.
6. Blizzards - The peanut butter cup variety
7. Finding happiness
8. 2007 or 27

8 Things I want to do before I die
1. Travel the world
2. Learn to play an instrument well
3. Become a morning person
4. Learn photography
5. Get married
6. Learn to swim
7. Meet my potential
8. Live in a big city

8 Things I say often
1. "I'm just sayin'..."
2. "Seriously?"
3. "I heart ____"
4. "Let's be honest"
5. "I love it so much."
6. "Oopsy daisy."
7. "Did you watch ______ last night?"
8. "Too funny."

8 Books I've recently read
1. Eclipse
2. New Moon
3. Twilight
4. A Thousand Splendid Suns
5. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
6. The Reading Group
7. US Weekly (Every Saturday morning)
8. The Book of Mormon (Cheese-tastic, but true)

8 Songs I Could Listen to Over and Over
1. "Everything" - Michael Buble
2. "Bicycle Tricycle" - Rosie Thomas
3. "Tune Out" - The Format
4. "Ok, It's Alright With Me" - Eric Hutchinson
5. "How to Save a Life" - The Fray
6. "Don't Stop Believin'" - Journey
7. "On My Mind" - Kalai
8. "Lost" - Michael Buble
*This was too hard! There are a lot to choose from.

8 Things that Attract Me to My Best Friends
1. Someone who loves to laugh
2. Someone who is intelligent
3. Someone who is a good listener
4. Someone who has a big heart
5. Someone who doesn't take themselves too seriously
6. Someone who is real
7. Someone who can be serious when the time comes
8. Someone who is loyal

8 things I've learned in the last year
1. Time does, in fact, heal all wounds. Or at least some you felt wouldn't ever heal.
2. I'm a better spender than a saver.
3. A swimsuit isn't necessarily of the devil.
4. Jim loves Pam.
5. I'm willing to suffer through a lot in order to avoid change.
6. I don't give myself enough credit sometimes.
7. I love to see new places.
8. My haircut made me look like a boy and no one bothered to tell me.

Well, there you have it.

170 Calories

Today I drank a non-diet root beer. A&W Root Beer. It was delicious.

Say root beer six times in a row and try to tell me it doesn't get weird.

Monday, September 10, 2007

This is my jam!

The Jamboree Music Festival was fun on Saturday. We didn't get there until almost 5:00 so we missed a few of the bands but made it in time to see everyone I was looking forward to.

We saw The Aquabats (who are possibly the most annoying people ever created), Colbie Caillat, The Format, Toad the Wet Sprocket and Dashboard Confessional.
Those people on the blanket in front of us Lindsay called "the fondlers". As soon as it got dark they were all over each other.

Colbie sounded as good in person as she does on her CD. The video quality is pretty bad because I was so far away, but you get the idea.


The Format were great! I realized I don't know their Dog Problems album as well as I should, but the songs from Interventions and Lullabies were fantastic! They played all of my favorites.

This is my absolute favorite - "Tune Out".


They also played "The First Single". This one is for you Angelique!
(Sorry if you can hear my singing in this one...)


Dashboard finished up the night. I wasn't as impressed as I was when I saw them in Vegas, but it was still good.


There's just something about a large group of people all singing together (in a non-church setting) that I love. It gives me the chills sometimes.


Next up in my fall concert series is Brandi Carlile in Boise and possibly Dashboard and The Plain White T's in SLC. I act like I have a lot of money (which I don't), but really just love live music!