Spotlight

When I was in college our ward got together every Sunday night on the "balcony" outside my apartment for ward prayer. I'll be honest, this wasn't really my cup of tea. You were more likely to find me at home at the kitchen table, in my pj's, frantically studying for a test or writing a paper that was due the next day than you were to find me there. There were, however, times when I could be convinced to show up.

One of those times happened to be when the ladies of my apartment were the lucky recipients of the "Spotlight". (This just keeps getting better and better, right?). Some people got creative when it came to spotlighting their apartment by writing/singing songs, poems, etc. but that was just too BYU for us. We chose the simple route and each took a turn introducing one of our roommates with the one rule that we could say whatever we wanted. That's a recipe for disaster if I've ever heard one.

I can't remember who introduced me and I don't remember everything she said about me, but I do remember a this: she gave everyone in the ward the key to making me uncomfortable.

You see, I have this list of words that I can't stand. Every time I hear them I cringe. And it's not because of the meaning of the word. It's just the way they sound.

moist.
panties.
lover.
indentation.
ointment.

See what I mean? Say OINTMENT a few times to yourself and then try and tell me it doesn't make you shudder a little. The complete list was much longer than that, but I can't totally remember all of them. Or maybe I just don't want to tell you.

Anyway, one of my dear roommates chose that time, in front of my entire apartment complex (and the neighboring complex + random nearby houses) to announce that I had a list of words that I hated. Can you guess what happened next? Everyone started using them in sentences and shouting them at me. And pretty much anytime they saw me after that point. Awesome.

I thought of this story today as typed about wiping my finger with an alcohol swab. WIPE. Yeah, that's on the list. If it wasn't before today then it is now.

Oh, and one of the other tid-bits my roommate chose to share? The fact that I have a Big Head Complex. As in, I'm sensitive about the size of my huge noggin. So as I stood there in front of a mass of people staring at me, she basically invited them to shift their attention to my head and silently judge me for how large it is.

And next time you see me, you'll do the same. Just trust me, it's grande.