Blue Box from Hell

I think Ikea has some sort of magical power. Once you step inside those giant blue walls, all common sense and frugality disappear and you just throw everything you see into your cart. The word "budget" loses all meaning.

Let me start from the beginning. I have a dresser. My dresser is too small. I have a bookshelf. My bookshelf has served me well, but isn't very stylish.

(Please see exhibits A & B below.)

I had seen a book shelf at Ikea that you could put doors on so I thought I would buy that, put doors on the bottom to store clothes in and leave the top open for books, pictures, etc.

That's all. One bookshelf was the plan. Well, this is what really happened.

Bookshelf? Check.
Really cute duvet? Check.
New set of sheets to match the new duvet? Check.
New pillow cases to match the new sheets to match the new duvet? Check.
Shoe drawers? Check. (It would solve the shoes all over the closet floor problem! C'mon!)
Boxes to store my movies under my bed? Check.

I thought that was it. A few more items than I had anticipated, but no big deal. Wrong. On the way out one of the last things I saw was a dresser. A lovely dresser that happened to be the exact color of the new bookshelf I was buying. I debated, but Lindsay's argument that I could sell my old furniture online tipped me over the edge.

New chest of drawers? Check.

Over $500 later and we were on our way.


I got home, excited about the purchases and ready to get to work. First, I opened the bookshelf box only to find that it was the skinnier version of the one I really wanted. Bummer. On to the dresser. Lindsay opened the dresser box only to find that the side panel was a mess of shattered wood. No longer a bummer - more along the lines of anger. It was 9pm; the store was closed.

Ikea Day 2. I packed up my car and headed out at 9:45am to make sure I was there right after opening. While wandering around the warehouse looking for the correct bookshelf, I happened upon some nightstands - which got me thinking...I can't sell my old dresser without the nightstand, but I can't just not have a nightstand. Oohh, look at this one. It matches the color of my new bookshelf and my new dresser perfectly.

Nightstand? Check.

With the nightstand, correct bookshelf and replacement dresser in hand, I went back home for my very own version of the New Yankee Workshop.

The nightstand flew together. The bookshelf started out great but got a little rough towards the end when putting on the doors. Good thing Lindsay is a wizard with the drill and was able to make it all work. Last, but not least, the dresser. We opened the box only to find that it was the WHITE version of the dresser I wanted. Skip bummer, skip anger, let's go straight to irate. I packed up the dresser, yelling about how much I hate Ikea the whole time, and headed back down to Draper for my third trip to Ikea in 2 days.

Meanwhile, Lindsay packed up the power tools and some under-the-bed boxes to assemble in the car. Let's not even talk about all the dangers of this situation.


After waiting in line, I finally got to the return counter. I explained my situation (that I'd already been there once today to exchange the shattered dresser that I purchased while I was there the day before) and was told that the computer was showing there were only five left and it may take up to 30 minutes for a worker to pull it and bring it to the counter. Could I go get it myself? Nope; not allowed.

It also turned out that the lady at the return counter from that morning didn't do any paperwork on my exchange, so the item I now had was a different price than the one I originally purchased. Perfect.

Red-headed, curly-haired afro guy finally came (with an "I hate my job" look on his face) to pull the item from the warehouse. He went, came back empty-handed, and said that they were out of stock. Cue anger. The nice lady at the counter checked the system again and confirmed that they were, in fact, out of stock. When will the next shipment come in? Well, there's no exact date, but most likely in 5 weeks. 5 WEEKS!

She "recommended" that I bring back the whole set (I was only exchanging box 1 of 2), get a refund, and come back in 5 weeks. This would require me going home, getting box 2 and coming back AGAIN. No thanks.

In my frustration I turned to Lindsay and demanded she go check the shelf. Seeing the anger in my eyes she disregarded the fact that I demanded her to go, went, came back and said that there are about 12 on the shelf. There was hope.

The lady behind the counter could sense my frustration (or maybe it was the fact that I said, "I'm getting really frustrated" out loud) and asked her manager if I could go get it myself. Nope; still not allowed.

Manager: What does the computer say?
Worker: Out of stock.
Manger: Well, then we don't have anymore.
Me: NO. She just checked and there are several boxes.
Manger: Did you call upstairs to have someone come pull it?
Worker: Yes, like 5 times. No one is answering.
Manager: Call again.
Me (to Lindsay): Can you go stand by it so no one takes it?
Manger: Yeah, you might want to because it could very well be gone by the time we get to it.
*Note: Not the way to make an already angry customer feel better.
Worker: Someone is going to get it right now.

Lindsay ended up having to guide the Ikea employee to the right location, but I got it! We opened the box right there to make sure it was the right one and not damaged. Everything checked out and I walked out of the big blue building vowing to not return for a long, long time.

I had to rearrange my room to make it all work, but I like it. I don't have everything put away, but for the most part it's done.


















Was it worth it all? I'm not quite sure.