conversation of the day.

Me: I just don't think spending $250 on a pair of sunglasses is necessary. I mean, you can get them at Target for $15.
New Co-Worker: Are you married?
Me: ...no.
NCW: Really?
Me: Really.
NCW: With that kind of low maintenance attitude I'd think guys would be lining up.
Me: Well, I guess I just have them all fooled.

honey badger.

This video is old news. HOWEVER, still funny.
(Also, I should warn you that you shouldn't watch if foul language offends you.)

Today I received an email from a co-worker who has been out of the office for a few months (hence being a little behind on the latest and greatest of YouTube) and it said:

Okay, I don't know if this is a compliment or not, but as soon as I saw this video I thought of you because I thought you'd appreciate it.

I'm going to go ahead and take it as a compliment.
And I'm not really surprised since we laughed ourselves to tears over this video. (Again, not for sensitive ears.)

conversation of the {fri}day.

Me: Have you told anyone yet?
NotMe: Just you. Oh, and Bill*.
Me: And Jimbo*.
NotMe: Oh yeah. And Jimbo. So you were third and third's the best of all the game.
Me: What does that mean?
NotMe: First the worst, second the same, third's the best of all the game.
Me: Is that how it goes? I always thought it was First the worst, second the best, third the turd...so in this scenario I'm the turd.

Apparently we grew up in different places. And it's clear which location was classier.


*Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

glitter girl

Last night Stacey had a show at the Skylark and invited me along to sing a handful of songs. The Skylark is a dingy, old bar in West Seattle, but I kind of love it. Maybe I have a special place in my heart for it because it was the first place I was brave enough to get on stage and sing. Maybe it's because the sound is more legit than anywhere else we play. Who knows.

Here's a very short recap of the evening in photos.

1. I had trouble deciding what to wear. I'm in hate with all of my clothes at the moment. But after finally picking an outfit, I went to the bathroom to fix my hair and found that I kind of liked what was going on. I got my hair cut in December (after looking at this photo for too long) and have hated it ever since, but something about last night just felt right. So I self-portraited it.

PS - I really need new glasses.

2. We've played at this bar a few times, but last night was the first night they let us use the "artist's room" which I guess is the equivalent of Green Room in TV land. It was interesting, to say the least. Dark, full of old mirrors and leopard print furniture and they even provided a couple products we might need prior to going on stage:

• Mary Kay moisturizer. You know, in case your face is dry.
• Glitter Girl. Because a girl needs to glitter on stage.

I'm so grossed out by this. And the Glitter Girl is almost gone. Ew.

3. Steph & Stace on stage.

All in all, a good night.

honey boo boo

Am I ashamed of how much I love this video? A little.
But I could watch the last :15 on repeat all day long.

Get More: TV Shows, Full Episode Video, Reality TV Shows

I'm gonna work the stage. Gonna work the stage.

the first loser.

I came in second, y'all.
I chose Green Bay in the second round of the Playoffs and that choice proved to be the end of the road for me.

My co-worker sent me this yesterday in honor of my loss.

important updates.

1. I sold the KitchenAid. But it went to a good home and I'll have visitation.
2. I've put the Dyson to good use, even cleaning houses other than my own. (You could be next!)
3. The NFL regular season is over and I tied for first with one other person in the Pick 'Em league.

are you ready for some football?

I have a list of things I should be doing right now, including working, packing, cleaning, Christmas gifting, etc. But instead I'm going to be irresponsible and blog about insignificant things.

Three cheers for irresponsibility!

Here's the deal: I've been (sort of) into the NFL this season. My team at work has a pick 'em league which entails choosing one team we think will win each week, while not choosing any team twice throughout the season. I consult with TN every week via gchat and we make our pick. I was tied with two others for first place until last week when the Giants failed me.

Regardless, it's made me pay attention to the NFL. So that made it all the more exciting when I got the chance to go to my first ever (and second) NFL game in Seattle. The Seahawks had two weeknight games this year and I was lucky enough to go to both.

And the most brilliant part (aside from not having to pay for any of it)? They actually won both of them! I like to think it's because I'm such a great spectator.

Game One: Hawks vs. Eagles
We were only a few rows up at the 30 yard line (and in the middle of all the Eagles fans). It was also very cold, but I got a hot dog so I'm counting it as a win.

Game Two: Hawks vs. Rams
If the first game was cold, this game might as well have been played at the North Pole. SO COLD. This was also an important game because I had picked the Seahawks that week for Pick 'Em. They didn't let me down.

Two NFL games in 10 days is enough to tide me over for a while, but it sure was fun.

self.

I have a friend that likes to include photos of himself with text messages to help deliver the spirit of the message. I have to say, I kind of love it. So today I decided to respond in kind and returned this photo with my response.

My first thoughts after looking at this photo:
1. My hair is LONG.
2. The chubby cheek look stopped being adorable around age three.
3. I honestly forget I have dimples. Or is there just one? I don't even know.

Another story about this photo.
I went to a work event tonight and in the car on the way there I passed my phone to a co-worker to show her some pictures of the Christmas decor in my house. Then she passed it on to the girl on the other side of her and, long story short, buttons were pushed, confusion set in and suddenly she was staring at this photo of me. Obviously taken of myself at my desk at work.

Of course I then felt the need to explain why I had taken a photo of myself. They tried to stop me, but of course I felt the need to provide all the details surrounding the incident. I ended up pulling up the text message, showing his photo, reading aloud his message, re-showing my photo and reading aloud my response.

Awkward.
For everyone, I'm sure.

In a related story, after an incident last week at a football game where he had to save me from myself in a conversation with a food vendor, AB said to me, "You know, sometimes I think your love of the details makes things harder for you."

I don't think that might be the case. I'm sure of it.

telephone.

My roommate came in the room while I was on the phone last night and through the course of my conversation I was laughing pretty hard. When I hung up the phone she said, "I've never seen you so happy. I have to know who you were talking to."
"My sister", I replied.

We were talking about heart palpitations and mashed potato sandwiches.
You would have laughed too.

decisions. decisions.

Cyber Monday got the best of me.
Long story short, I ended up making two large purchases.
(The deals were going to expire!)
(Also? I'm an advertiser's dream.)
And ended up immediately having buyer's remorse.


But you can't beat a 6 quart Kitchen Aid for nearly 50% off. Right?!?

And I've been on the verge of buying a Dyson for six months.

So, the question is - do I keep them?

feeling festive.

Thanksgiving happened.
And before you think this post will be full of photos of turkeys and rolls and pies, let me tell you right now that is not the case. In fact, I did not take a single picture of the day.
I struggled with Thanksgiving this year. Not the part about being thankful, I'm totally into gratitude, but just the holiday part. A large part of me wanted to spend the day alone. Weird? Probably.
In the end I knew mid-day would roll around and I'd be wishing I was eating carbs somewhere, so I made fruit salad, rolls and pie and joined a gathering of people. The right decision? Probably.

But here's the thing, while I wasn't feeling Thanksgiving this year, I'm totally digging Christmas.
The Christmas spirit has already rooted itself in my heart, which is due in large part to Jenny and I spending the weekend getting the house all festive for our upcoming holiday party.

A few weekends ago we hit up Hobby Lobby for Christmas decorations. Did you know every other weekend it's 50% off? I didn't either, but it's pretty amazing. And it's a good thing we went early because it's all picked over now. We decided on Peacock Blue and Copper as our colors.

You can't tell from the photo, but it's totally adorable.

On Saturday Jenny ventured out and chopped us down a tree.

 Setting up a tree is a PROCESS but thanks to the internets, Jenny had it all planned out.

 A Noble Fir. Sounds fancy.
And it's 10 years old, which makes me just want to give it a hug.

A trip to Target and some overspending later, it was finished. It's delightful. I just want to turn out all the lights and stare at it while listening to Bing Crosby and Johnny Mathis.

We also decorated the mantle with real garland (a first for me), made wreaths and watched White Christmas. It all looks much better in non-iPhone photo life.

And topping it all off, Jenny cut out lyrics to Christmas songs and we strung them around the dining room.

Trust me, it's awesome.

It's cool, December. You can come anytime. We're ready for you.

give it all back.

I saw Noah & the Whale last week and haven't been able to stop listening since.
This isn't my favorite song of theirs, but every time the chorus comes on I can't help but bop around.

conversation of the (yester)day.

Me: I actually used those words.
Me: By the way, I appreciate that you know I'm crazy but you never call me out directly.
Other Person: The thing is, it's not that I don't think to say the things you say...
Me: ...you just don't actually say them. Yeah, that's not possible for me.

Related: this post.

a sail.

Another video, folks. (Sort of.)
This song is my latest obsession.

call your girlfriend.

Is it any surprise that I love this?

Didn't think so.

Thanks, S. Reale!

the pit of despair.

My neighbor looks like this. I mean, more or less.

We had a little run-in over the summer where he and his wife fairly aggressively confronted me (I may have cried) about how we had been parking in the driveway even though it's technically shared. In our defense, our landlord had told us they had an agreement with the neighbor and we were free to park there. According to the neighbor no such agreement existed and they had essentially been bent out of shape about it FOR A YEAR AND A HALF.

Well, now I'm bent out of shape (still) about their aggressive confrontation and what's making me even more bent out of shape is the fact that they are now parking in the driveway. Every day.

Please tell me how that makes any sense.
And please tell me I shouldn't key their car. Because the thought has crossed my mind once or twice.

it's the most wonderful time of the year

Raise your hand if you thought of Johnny Mathis singing a Christmas song when you read that title.

Probably only my family. Awesome.

Well, Johnny was wrong. The most wonderful time of the year is Fall, when it's done right.
And Seattle is doing Fall right this year.

Crisp, sunny days (my favorite!) have been delivered to my doorstep more than once. The leaves have changed, cider and donuts have been consumed, pumpkin patches visited and daylight savings depression was delayed until November. I mean, what's not to love?

Saturday was one of those perfect days. My roommate and I took a little stroll around the neighborhood and I couldn't help exclaiming, several times, "I love this day!".

I carried that leaf for several blocks before realizing it was pointless.

Moral of the story, things have been good around here. Real good.



And my gift to you is this awesomely bad video of Johnny Mathis.

clever title: halloween.

Facebook is ablaze tonight with photos of everyone's kids looking totes adorbs (translation: totally adorable) in their little costumes. But for us single folk, Halloween felt like it was over by the time today rolled around.

I impressed myself this year. I had not one, not two, but three - THREE - costumes. 
Why is this impressive?
1. I have a love hate relationship with Halloween and even coming up with a single costume is very near rocket science in my book. Real hard.
For your reference, I've recapped my recent Halloween struggles adventures.
2008
2009
2010

2. I'm somewhat socially awkward, so the fact that I participated in three activities needing costumes is worthy of giving myself a high five.

Friday
A dance. In a gym. At a church.
It sort of hurts to even write those words, but whatever. It actually turned out to be one of the more enjoyable parts of the weekend.

I had zero intention of going to that dance so that costume was not planned, but my roommate Jenny is like Mary Poppins and just always has what you need. Oh, you need a beret? Got one. You need some red fabric for a scarf? I just happen have some lying around. I'm excited to find out what else she's hiding in that carpet bag.

Saturday
A party. At a house on the East side.

Snowflake & Leslie Knope.
Also? Am I really that much shorter than Stacey?

I accidentally took this picture of myself (front camera as a mirror on the iPhone, anyone?) but I sort of like it because you can see the makeup a little better, which for the record I did not do myself.

Again Jenny and her bag of tricks provided the inspiration for this costume. She pulled out that headband and it just snowballed from there. (Get it? Snowball...)

 Marty McFly, Ron Burgundy and Sexy Sax Man.

Ron Burgundy and Veronica Corningstone

And let's just throw in one more photo from Friday night of Adam looking disgustingly awesome.

Monday
A dinner party. A mad scientist theme.

I was told it was hard to talk to me because I looked like a cartoon, which might be my favorite thing anyone has ever said to me.

 PS - Second white wig of the weekend. Apparently a girl can never have too many.

And I stole the idea of unzipping AB's face from LL's sister on the internets today. I think it worked out well.

So there, you have it.
Three costumes. Three events. And I'm glad it's over.
Until next year, friends!

totes creepin'.

There was an infographic on Mashable today about how cellphones are influencing students' lives and one of the stats made me laugh.

The end.